if the burden seems too much to bear remember the end will justify the pain it took to get us there

Smooth sailing
contented silkiness
and unenthusiastic normalcy
is often interrupted
by a rumble in the clouds
quick slip of the wrist
one gouge of the blade
into creamy beige skin
and bright burgundy blood
bubbles up from my heel
fountain of exclaim
crimson symbol of my pain
soon to be dead but now
glaringly alive
the color rose red
like my 17 fantasies
daydream sweet solace
as my aching soul
mind racing with anticipation
heart frozen to all others
but stil beating
insistently
pumping blood
and needed oxygen
to my stilled mind racing
stalled on one obsession
not even realizing
my quivering hnd
healer of all innocence
wiping away
my spurting blood
though unable to stop it
one chink in the armor
one sore in the flesh
one hole in the floodgate
and there's no stopping the rest.

Well that was profound....analysis anyone?